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How to Say Goodbye

ebook
2 of 2 copies available
2 of 2 copies available
A USA TODAY Bestseller
An NPR "Book We Love"
A finalist for the California Book Award
"A poem to mortality and the beauty of how we can cope with it." -Atul Gawande, author of Being Mortal
New York Times-bestselling artist Wendy MacNaughton shares wisdom from hospice caregivers: how to be, when to help, what to say-with full-color drawings throughout.


As artist-in-residence at the Zen Hospice Project Guest House in San Francisco, Wendy MacNaughton witnessed firsthand how difficult it is to know what to do when we're sharing final moments with a loved one. In this tenderly illustrated guide to saying goodbye, MacNaughton shows how to make sure those moments are meaningful. Using a framework of "the five things" taught to her by a professional caregiver, How to Say Goodbye provides a model for having conversations of love, respect, and closure: with the words "I forgive you," "Please forgive me," "Thank you," "I love you," and "Goodbye," each oriented toward finding mutual peace and understanding when it matters most.

With a foreword by renowned physician and author BJ Miller, and practical resources, How to Say Goodbye features MacNaughton's drawn-from-life artwork from both the Zen Hospice Project Guest House and her own aunt's bedside as she died, paired with gentle advice from hospice caregivers on creating a positive sensory experience, acknowledging what you can't control, and sharing memories and gratitude. A poignant guide to embracing the present and deepening relationships during great vulnerability, How to Say Goodbye shows that just as there is no one right way to live a good life, there is no one right way to say goodbye. Whether we're confused, scared, or uncertain, this book is a starting point.
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    • Booklist

      July 1, 2023
      Years ago, MacNaughton served as an artist-in-residence at a now closed San Francisco hospice. She first published her illustrated reflections of what that residency taught her about accompanying those who are dying as a 200-copy "artists' book," and the feedback she received inspired her to publish this version for a larger audience. While MacNaughton has authored and/or illustrated ten books, it's her collaboration in Samin Nosrat's Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat (2017) that will make her joyfully faithful and expressive cartooning style instantly recognizable to readers. Full-page illustrations show residents falling asleep, knitting, or sending emails while drinking a coke. There are through lines in the form of vases of flowers that wilt as the book progresses, and from-life drawings of MacNaughton's own aunt as she died. Words are spare, poignant, and practical: "If you don't know what to say, start by saying that. That's very vulnerable." An introduction from a hospice physician and a list of resources round this out as a perfect library book: one that everyone could use, one time or another.

      COPYRIGHT(2023) Booklist, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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  • English

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